I Finally Found Myself.

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My name is Kirsten Boileau. I have no idea who I am. I lost myself along time ago, if you can even say it was myself I knew. This life I lead scares me and the life ahead scares me even more. I am really hard to figure out and I am too easy to say goodbye to. Some people say I change their lives, and I do, I ruin them. So it's best to never get to know me. I say I am complex but most of that is due to my Personality Disorders, not me myself. You will never know what I am thinking, because my mind is forever changing, as is my life. I might be here one day and leave the next. I'm a wanderer, so please step back and let me go. Because things never do really change, do they?

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

Woke up today, not really tired at all the rest of the day... which is unusual. I have no idea if my pills are actually starting to work, or if I'm just starting to go into mania. But the day was gooooood. Went to my ankle doctor, he gave me the okay to walk in my regular shoes, with the orthodics in them, that is. So no more boots, unless I start getting achie and whatnot.

Then got met my parents and off to Orlando. The school is letting back in. So I will be starting on the A side, which is Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday... No longer Thursday, Friday, and Saturday. Which I am stoked for because I can work better places now AND my 21st birthday is going to be on a Friday in March. After we got that good news, we went to my parents friends house in Apoka, she is going through a divorce and it is literally eating her up. It's sad. Reminds me of how I was when Julian and I broke up. Oh I should talk about Julian and how he fits into the picture, but not now. That will take a lot out of me.

After a nice meal with my parents we headed home. And once I got home. I got totally pissed. First I had to pee really bad, and my freak of a sister has to lock every door lock in the house when she is home alone, so I had to fumble with the locks and she didn't even get up to help me. Her arse was on the computer with her laptop. Second she didn't take out my dogs all day so someone peed on my pillow and Zuki (who has accidents because of bladder problems) took her diaper off and it was dirty on my bed. Shit hit the fan then. I am still getting over how mad I am.. well was. Cara (my sister) is never home, so I take her dog out all the time, so she doesn't shit herself in her cage. No more. That dog can live in it's poop for all I care, I AM NOT TAKING IT OUT! She doesn't even deserve a dog. She doesn't take care of Bella (her dog), my dad does.

And ways... I need to cool down....

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